Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Memories

We spent the evening at my Moms celebrating her birthday.  It was a wonderful evening.  We had spaghetti of course... We are the Henley women after all... And after dinner the kids retreated to their room and the boys to the living room.  My Mom, sister and I stayed on the couch in her den and looked at old family photos on the computer for hours.
   Those photos brought back so many memories.  Of times gone by... Of people who were no longer here, and of the lives we once inhabited.  I would not trade now for then in a million years.. Life without my husband and babies is no life at all... But I was a little sad while looking for a lot of different reasons.  
   The people in these pictures were so close.  We spent time together... Real time where we sat and just talked. We spent hours at the park or cookouts.  We would spend days just sitting on the porch talking.  There weren't any distractions, we were just being us.  
  I realized that those people and those times had past us, and that this generation, the generation of my mother and my sisters and our families... Were the upcoming generations expected to carry on traditions and make some memories of our own. Why is it so different now? 
   I know a lot is because my perception has changed.  When I was a little girl my Papaw used to take me to a service station that sold ice cream by the scoop. I thought that was the greatest place in the world.  Now my infrequent visits prove to be far less impressive.. But I can remember the excitement that I once felt just by the smell of a garage.  We lose so much when we step out of that glorious world of childhood.  
   But I think it's more than that.  
   My sister said that it was probably because people are just too busy.  Maybe that's it.  More than likely not... Those people on those photos worked 40 or more hours per week and still found time just to spend together.  But then... Time was so much slower somehow. People were less rushed.  
  My husband checked his email as we were pulling out of a service station the other day. I asked him if anything could possibly be too important to wait for.  I think that we are conditioned to rush things.  To hurry things.  Instant gratification makes waiting seem like such a waste of time.  We want things now and that's what we are used too whether we realize it or not.  
   I look in the faces of those people in my photos... And although I'm not sure that The Lord will tarry his coming long enough for my photos to be the old family photos... But of they are I pray that one day my kids will look on those photos with fondness and hope for a better world.  Not one where people stare at screens when they visit or live their lives from one Facebook like to the next.  I pray my kids will remember what it really felt like... And that it would draw their hearts to a familiar place called home as it does mine to see them.  
  I have prayed for this.. And possibly this is why I struggle so much with Facebook.  It's hard for me to live a life that's so artificial.  It seems like in denying my children those warm feelings.  
   I have to fight the feelings of desire for instant gratification everyday. I'm just as used to it as anyone else... I've grown up in the era of get it now..I just have to turn my heart to reality... Something that is harder to grasp everyday... I can't focus on the life that I can create for myself... I need to focus on the life right in front of me.  Sometimes God had plans we can't see because we see the moment and he is dealing with eternity.  So I pray to learn the value of a moment... The power of a memory, and the importance of slowing down and seeing what you can see if you talk a slower walk.  Not all who wander are lost... After all.





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